The Elon-12 Chronicles, No. 5: I Disappeared Myself Into Madness

by | Apr 18, 2022 |

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

Why am I feeling more determined right now? Maybe it’s remembering more about her and the two days we had together before we were snatched apart. Yes, I remember that now in more detail, how they tore us right out of each other’s arms. Oh, God, that’s what I am always glimpsing in the darkness of this damned place — her face as she is being pulled away from me. She is looking at me with an expression of…I dare not name that wonderful expression on her face for fear you will think me foolish…for fear I am being foolish and even stupid for how I feel about her and imagine us.

I swear to you, this cold black room lights up when I imagine her, and then when I glimpse the fleeting image of her face, it grows dark in here again, all around me again, as she recedes. She is a vision so bright she gives me light in the darkness in a room with no window and no lights turned on — and if that seems crazy to you, then you are missing the most important point of all. It’s the point I missed my entire life until spending two days with her…

I know until now, I’ve been thinking and writing like a crazy person. And now I’m facing myself, and that’s lifting the insanity I’ve been enveloped within. I have so betrayed my values as a physician, and so betrayed my patients, their families and friends, and the whole of society. My mind couldn’t stand it, and so I lost it.    

No, I’m not the victim of some mass psychosis. They didn’t hypnotize me or make me crazy with newfangled propaganda. They threatened me with losing my identity — my career as a doctor, even my medical license — and I clung to that identity at the expense of my honesty and honor. Then in shame and confusion, I disappeared myself into madness.

I blamed the Elon-12, that nanotech creepy thing inside my brain and mind. I told myself it was making me come apart emotionally. Then I blamed my condition on what they are doing to me now — it feels like for months and months. I blamed my condition on everything and anything…except myself. I know it now: Responsibility can have no “ifs, ands, or buts” because for every one of those excuses we lose a piece of ourselves.  

So it’s not the nanomachine, the Elon-12 inside my head, and it’s not being locked up in solitary. It’s not a sophisticated psychological warfare campaign that drove me out of mind.

Maybe you have felt this yourself, but it feels new to me. I feel remorse, an unspeakably deep and torturous regret. Not irrational guilt, but a genuine remorse rooted in the reality of what I have done.  

Do any of you know or share my feelings? It’s as if I am making myself clear to myself for the first time. It’s so easy to blame circumstances for how we conduct ourselves — but I chose to betray everything admirable about being a physician, a healer, a good human being.  

I could have refused to go along with jabbing my patients, making them into GMO experiments. I knew better, but I dreaded being fired from my clinic and hospital. If I dared to say or write anything about our betrayal of our patients, I’d never again be named a Best Doctor. Yes, that’s how shallow I became; I did not want to go out of favor. 

More terrorizing to the core, I saw what they did to my colleagues who dared take a stand. They destroyed them professionally. So I sold out. I corrupted our sacred patient-physician relationship—our pledge to do no harm and to inform our patients about the dangers of any of our treatments. I told lies that there are no effective treatments for COVID. I refused to give lifesaving treatments when I knew they were available. 

You see how clear my thinking has become. 

What is making me change so drastically? Maybe I’m just sick of hiding from myself, huddled inside myself here in the dark. They say there’s nothing worse than solitary confinement in total darkness, but I think it gave me comfort — that and my craziness gave me comfort. Now I do not care how uncomfortable I become. I will no longer let them shred my soul. 

It’s more than remembering her that is reviving me. I confess to still being governed by my circumstances. In a confinement so total, no one can spiritually escape entirely from captivity. The soul cannot insulate itself from life. In the last few weeks, they have given me a bit of light, and turned on the dirty bulb in my ceiling for a few hours a day some days. They’ve even left a pad of paper and pencils that they take away when they turn out the light again. I have to shove it back under the steel door. Maybe this is their way of getting me to write the confession I refuse to them. Maybe they hope I’ll write something to incriminate myself or even her.  

Knowing I have the chance to write when they turn on the light and shove the pad and pencil under the door, I store up my thoughts in my head until I feel like I will burst with them. Then, the minute the light goes on, I start writing down all that I have crammed into my memory since the previous day. It’s almost like a purge. 

I wish I could get a note to her. I hope she can forgive me. I want to say to her, “You do not know how bad I am.”

I do not try to forgive myself. How can anyone forgive himself for silently participating in mass murder? Giving those injections. Refusing to give lifesaving treatments. Not even letting our patients or friends know the truth.  

I have asked God for forgiveness, but so far have heard nothing in return.

Listen to me, all of you, starting with my colleagues. We have been committing crimes against ourselves, our patients, and humanity. Stop everything else you are doing. Forget about the forgiveness stuff I’ve just been mumbling about. Work on facing the truth, and that in itself will begin to set you free. That’s the change in me. I’ve made a decision to face the truth about myself. 

All of us have sacrificed something of our integrity to the masters of COVID-19. All of us must face that truth! I am a medical doctor, and I knew better — and I let them stick experimental codes of RNA and DNA into my children to force their bodies to make a deadly spike protein. I let them inject a billion chemical contraptions into the arms of my children — nanotech monsters invisible to the naked eye and much more dangerous to them than COVID-19 itself. The only deaths of children caused solely by “COVID-19” are from the jabs that inflict a variant of COVID upon them. What punishment could possibly fit a father allowing such a thing — infusing hordes of genetic timebombs into my own children, now ticking away inside them?

What must I do? What must any of us do — to make up for this cowardly sacrifice of our own children?

I am beginning to understand. This is no longer about how bad I am or whether I can be forgiven. This is about one thing and one thing only. Now that I have faced myself, what am I going to do about it now? Now is all that matters! 

They have turned the light off.  

I must shove my notes and two pencil stubs back under the door.

Avatar

These anonymous Elon-12 Chronicles are being actively extracted from heavily encrypted and somewhat corrupted files hacked from a federal site maintained by Homeland Security.

As we all know, Elon-12 implants and other technology not only empowered the human brain with AI, but also changed the human experience of time and reality. If these chronicles seem to come from the remote past, they could as easily have originated in the future, or both. Because of how Elon-12 reshaped our sense of reality—physical, psychological, moral, and spiritual—we can only hope that our brains, if not more advanced as planned, can at least be restored to a semblance of wholeness.

With the hope of reclaiming our individual integrity, we dedicate our work on these documents to humanity. To protect our mission, we must, like the as-yet-unidentified author of the chronicles, remain anonymous.

Subscribe
Notify of
guest
0 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

Disclaimer: The information contained in this website is for educational, general information, and entertainment purposes only and is never intended to constitute medical or legal advice or to replace the personalized care of a primary care practitioner or legal expert.

While we endeavor to keep this information up to date and correct, the information provided by America Out Loud, its website(s), and any properties (including its radio shows and podcasts) makes no representations, or warranties of any kind, expressed, or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability, suitability, or availability with respect to its website(s) or the information, products, services or related graphics and images contained on the website(s) for any purpose.

The opinions expressed on the website(s), and the opinions expressed on the radio shows and podcasts, are the opinions of the show hosts and do not necessarily represent the opinions, beliefs, or policies of anyone or any entity we may endorse. Any reliance you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk.

At no time, nor in any event, will we be liable for any loss, or damage, including without limitation, indirect or consequential loss of data or profits arising out of, in an association of, or connection with the use of this website.

Through this website, users can link to other websites that may be listed. Those websites are not under the control of America Out Loud or its brands. We have no control over the nature, content, or availability of those sites. America Out Loud has no control over what the sites do with the information they collect. The inclusion of any links does not necessarily imply a recommendation, nor does it endorse the views expressed with or by them.

Every effort is made to keep the website up and running smoothly. However, America Out Loud takes no responsibility for, nor are we, and will not be liable for being temporarily unavailable due to technical difficulties beyond our control. America Out Loud does not sell, trade, nor market email addresses or other personal data.

Genesis HOC1
CofixRX
Use the code ‘OUTLOUD’ and receive your 20% discount on your first order.
My Free Doctor.com
Trump and the Swamp That Still Oozes With Criminality

Trump and the Swamp That Still Oozes With Criminality

Forty-seven Democrats and forty-nine Republicans are under observation. Again, Nancy Pelosi was not included, but many trades demonstrated excellent timing, like Bob Gibbs (R-Ohio), who sits on the House Oversight Committee, allegedly purchased shares of the pharmaceutical company AbbVie in 2020 and 2021 even as his committee was investigating them for excessive drug prices…

History Repeats – ‘Control the Food, Control the Population’

History Repeats – ‘Control the Food, Control the Population’

Something more seems to be at play at the origin of our food supply. Currently, two of the most prominent investors in American farmland are China and Bill Gates. Government interference in how farmers are able to do their jobs is also causing issues. Throughout history, many mass famines and starvation of people have occurred because of government direction. Hitler, Stalin, and Mao…

A Disturbing Symptom of Social Disintegration; Mass Murder Incidents are an Ominous Sign

A Disturbing Symptom of Social Disintegration; Mass Murder Incidents are an Ominous Sign

The Social Justice approach to crime obviously contributes to the rising tide of violence. Although Leftists may consider the increasing crime rate a fair trade for the political capital they generate with their policies, what may be less obvious to many is that the degeneration of fundamental human morality poses an existential threat to the continuity of human society writ large…

Statesmanship is Overrated When You’re Fighting this Level of Corruption

Statesmanship is Overrated When You’re Fighting this Level of Corruption

Statesmanship is supposedly based on the once-long-standing rules of dignity, collegiality, and propriety, but the results are always the same. The Democrat’s rules of statesmanship are found in Saul Alinsky’s Rules for Radicals. The Left has been the only side fighting this war through the years. Republicans have been slammed to the mat so many times that they’ve gotten so used to it…

Stories of Corruption Cast a Dark Shadow Post-COVID and Q & A 46 on America Out Loud PULSE

Stories of Corruption Cast a Dark Shadow Post-COVID and Q & A 46 on America Out Loud PULSE

America Out Loud PULSE with Dr. Peter McCullough and Malcolm Out Loud – I distrust Pharma, period. That begs the question: To receive the flu shot this year or not? Should I still be concerned about potential heart scarring? Would the presence and persistence of spike in the body be a factor of whether myopericarditis resolves? Is there any present Danger from Covid-19 lab-made “Viruses”?

A Literary Thanksgiving of Gratitude: Twain, Rand, Cicero, Francovich, et al.

A Literary Thanksgiving of Gratitude: Twain, Rand, Cicero, Francovich, et al.

Ayn Rand’s take on this American holiday is truly insightful. Rand has the following to say about Thanksgiving Day: “The lavish meal is a symbol of the fact that abundant consumption is the reward of production.” Reflection about the many things that Americans should be grateful for is a healthy practice that breeds long-lasting goodwill while fending off…

Beyond Slogans – Keys to Winning in 2024

Beyond Slogans – Keys to Winning in 2024

The Democrats are not going to change anything even though continued political relevance demands that they change basically everything to sound more like JFK than Karl Marx, but here is the thing ⏤ by and large the American people just don’t care about election fraud in 2020 (or 2022). Running on that may win the primary, but it will lose the general election…

Your Guide to the Coming Riots

Your Guide to the Coming Riots

One of America’s great pastimes is “the protest.” A constitutionally protected right, it has somehow gotten confused with its violent and illegal cousin, “the riot.” It seems that today’s mainstream media has a rather difficult time discerning between the two. With a building burning intensely behind him, a reporter described an actual riot as a “mostly peaceful protest.”

On David Ralston (RIP) and Who Counts the Votes

On David Ralston (RIP) and Who Counts the Votes

Joseph Stalin once said he didn’t care who voted or how, but who counted the ballots. Like Stalin, the Democrats discovered that the voters weren’t important; the ballots were. Control of the ballot process, whether ballot harvesting, absentee, or mail-in ballots, so long as they have the ballot counting devices, they can win most elections…

The Security and Exchange Commission has No Business Making Climate Change Policy

The Security and Exchange Commission has No Business Making Climate Change Policy

The SEC approvingly cites several reports and numerous comments by prominent ESG advocates. However, the Commission seems unaware of the questionable premises on which much of that literature is based. For example: Favor climate risk assessments based on warm-biased models run with warm-biased emission scenarios. Societal factors such as increases in population and exposed wealth…

Stopping the Indoctrination of America’s Youth!

Stopping the Indoctrination of America’s Youth!

The Prism of America’s Education with Host Karen Schoen – The left calls the right misogynist racist, homophobic, etc. The right needs to call the left baby killers, drug pushers, rapists, and murderers. When they tell you to stop because it’s hurting their feelings, continue harder and more robust. Ask the tough who, what, where, when, and why questions…

The Biden Family Crime Syndicate

The Biden Family Crime Syndicate

While it was successfully covered up by the Democrat Party allies in the media, who declared that the contents of Hunter Biden’s laptop was the result of “Russian disinformation,” it’s since been determined that the laptop in question was and is legitimate. Was Barack Obama worried in 2019 that Biden’s criminal activities would come to light during a presidential campaign and could result in President Trump’s reelection, which is why he tried to subtly discourage Biden from running?

Weak New Medical Study on COVID Reinfection

Weak New Medical Study on COVID Reinfection

Getting it a second time is almost like you’re trying your chance again with Russian roulette,” said Ziyad Al-Aly, one of the study authors. “You may have dodged a bullet the first time, but each time you get the infection, you are trying your luck again. Not all published medical studies merit your attention; and mainstream media stories that work hard to instill fear in…

Genesis HOC1
CofixRX
Use the code ‘OUTLOUD’ and receive your 20% discount on your first order.
My Free Doctor.com
America Out Loud 6 years

Your Source for Free Speech, Talk Radio, Podcasts, and News.

 

Here we take on the challenges of our generation so that we can preserve future generations.

iHeartRadio

The APPS are free; the mission is priceless!

Free APP

Podcast Networks

Apple Podcasts
Google Podcasts
Spotify
Pandora
Tunein
iHeart
Stitcher

Subscribe and Listen on Your Favorite APP

Our Columnists and Show Hosts

Bookstore

Apple Podcasts

Click for the full bookstore.

Truth For Health

Apple Podcasts

COVID Solution Summit

Apple Podcasts

Evacuating Americans & fully-vetted Afghan's at Risk - Help Us!

Apple Podcasts

Empowering and mentoring conservative trailblazers from Generation Z to win!

Apple Podcasts

Turning Point Action is Recruiting Precinct Chairs - Become a Grassroots Warrior Today!

Apple Podcasts

URGENT - KEEP NINE
Please join us to protect the Supreme Court:
Sign the Petition!

Apple Podcasts

The LATINO USA EXIT from the Democrat Party, click for details...

Apple Podcasts

Fighting corporate censorship and ensuring voter integrity...

Apple Podcasts

Support wounded and fallen police officers. The Wounded Blue.

Wounded Blue
Share via
Copy link